Tuesday, July 19, 2011

A new enemy awaits, lurking in shadows...

(For the record, I wish I had pictures.  I do not, because Mr. G, being the fastidious man he is, keeps cleaning them up before I dig out the camera.  I'd complain about that but grousing about someone cleaning up is just foolishness personified.)

For the past several years, the kittehs have been oblivious to a mortal enemy that has stalked them as they enjoyed the relative  peace and tranquility of their home.

This month...La Doof Kitton discovered this fiend.  He has battled with this assailiant no fewer than 5 timssince midsummer's eve--maybe several other pitched battles have taken place that the household members are yet unaware of.

Now nightly, La Doof Kitton and this towering terror match wits and battle with fang and claw.  Thus far, though the battles have been hard fought and fraught with danger, the Kitton has sustained only minor wounds while inflicting serious damage on the enemy.
But the enemy is clever and powerful and, disguised as a necessary part of home life, he resurrects whenever the 2 legged creatures in the home approach him.  He comes back from the grave, his near demise never becomes permanent.

La Doof Kitton even took to dragging his kill out of the kitchen and into other rooms in the house to finish the job--quite a struggle when the fiend is mounted to a kitchen cabinet.   But still, the demise never remains permanent--like a phoenix from the ashes, a new dastardly villain takes up residence once the humans approach.

Mr. G, foolish mortal that he is, even had the audacity to place this creature-of-darkness out of the reach of Kittehs, in the "La Doof Kitton proof box".  Mr. G may have become a Thrall of the powerful enemy, hence extending his protection as he entombs the Kitton's rival away from the Kitton's teeth.

And that ^^ is why I found a roll of paper-towel in the microwave today.  Apparently it's the only way we don't loose half a roll of it, nightly, to the Kitton's new found desire to shred it.  He can pull it out of the holder, take it to other rooms, and dissect it very carefully.  So now, at bedtime, the pets get treats, and the paper towel is removed from the holder and joins the baked goods in the microwave

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Flowers for the Kitton

Buffy is learning how to 'fish for kittons":

You start with appropriate 'bait'.  Flags are excellent

Then you wave the bait around a lot.
It helps if you do this for the 'right' kitteh.  El Gato is not interested in flags when they are attached to loud, moving Buffy.

Eventually, the kitton, who has been waiting, just out of reach for ages, will be unable to resist and will come barreling out of nowhere to attack the bait.

Do you remember "Who framed Roger Rabbit"?  Where they tap 'shave and a hair cut' and the poor rabbit is trying DESPERATELY not to come bursting out but eventually can't stop himself?  Yep.  It looks a lot like that.
Buffy LOVES it when she finally wins.

You can also fish using a flower on a stick
Lookout behind you!  Lasers!

Conversations in our house..

These are recent conversations in the GB house (between the 2 grown-up humans who live here):

"What happened to the paper towel?"
"La Doof Kitton"
"oh. Why?"
"because he's a *expletive deleted because we try to be PG around here*. Apparently he just plain got pissy and managed to get on the counter last night, pull the roll of toweling off of the holder, and take it to the living room. Where he shredded it"
*La Doof Kitton strolls into the room*
"what did towels ever do to YOU?"
*he looks at us, jumps onto the counter where he isn't allowed, makes a claw-swipe at the towels, and then runs to the basement*
^I could add names to who said what but...I think it's interchangeable for us on this one. You can assume the EXACT same conversation was repeated about what happened to the stuff in my work bag I left on the kitchen table recently.

Conversation at 4 am
Me: "what's that noise?"
Mr G: "what noise?"
*rustling noise*
Me: "That noise"
*Horrible crash followed by skittering of claws/paws and baby crying from scary noises*
Me: "I got the baby, you figure out what La Doof Kitton has"
*Mr G. walks into the nursery where I'm comforting/feeding Buffy*
Mr G: "I forgot to put the cookies into the Kitton proof box. But I brought you a cookie!" *sharing cookie*
Me, to La Doof Kitton: "You know you're a bastard"
La Doof Kitton: *looks smug*