Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Great Birnam Chair comes to high Dunsinane dining room...

Tonight they made me laugh aloud.

Tonight, I picked up a few things that Buffy will be growing into out of the basment.
Among those things were a snuggli type carrier (which we, before Buffy arrived, tested by putting  La Doof Kitton in.  There was blood drawn; it's probably not wise to try it again.  For the record, he doesn't fit into Moby wraps well either.) and a booster seat-do-jobby- -(It is a wee tiny cheap plastic chair to strap to a larger chair)

I set the things next to the couch and went about my business--which involved trying to strap cats into the carriers (which entertained Buffy) and watching spots on the walls (cold medicine is fun!) and teaching about 'pet nice' (Both cats were very tolerant of their lessons and Dawg wandered about for several minutes (until I arrived w/ a burp cloth) with a large gob of baby-drool on her head--I swear she thought it was a badge of honor).

Then I heard a 'whump' in the kitchen.
The Mr. said 'I heard NOTHING' but by the 3rd time, we remembered that there were cookies that La Doof Kitton had tried to climb into earlier in the day (he wasn't content just stealing cookies, he climbed into the packaging and tried to pretend 'nobody here but us cookies!' was a valid form of camouflage, so continuing to say "I hear NOTHING" didn't seem wise.

I walk into the kitchen and all I see is a tail and the white of one back paw.

I wish I had a picture but let me describe it; do you remember when, as a kid, you watched a cartoon where a character hid behind a large stick and disused himself a s a tree?  or when they put a cardboard box over themselves and crept about and everyone believed it was a box?  But we all know that when, in real life, one tries such things, we look like kids holding large sticks (not trees) or a box with a girl under it, not a box stealthily moving past the bad-guys.

Well, apparently no one told La Doof Kitton that these disguises didn't work, he had grand visions of sneaking up on *something* and not being recognized as a cat.
A small blue booster seat with one paw and a tail sticking out, was slowly working it's way across the floor and had made it from the couch to the kitchen table.
I'm not quite sure what said booster seat was going to do once it was hiding amongst the big chairs; perhaps it was just waiting for an opportunity to observe chairs in their natural habitats.
But we need slightly bigger booster seats; ones that cover Scooter-tails and hind legs.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Dawg does not go on a trip...

Earlier this week, Mr. G took Buffy with him on a short trip.
He packed the baby into her car seat and headed out to the garage...

Now, Buffy is *almost* worth coming across the 'lava' (that is, the tile) for.  Some days, Dawg will brave the lava just so sneak in one more lick of the "puppy's" toes. (please note, this is always problematic because while Buffy is incentive worth braving all the way across the lava for, there's no incentive to make Dawg act brave BACK to the safety of carpet.  So Dawg could spend considerable amount of time 1-trapped 2-scrambling in a panic across the floor [because the faster she moves away from the lava, the less it hurts--at least that's what she thinks.  Unfortunately, the more she scrambles, the more likely she is to pop her knee back out of joint.  again.] or 3-being helped across the floor either by a grown-up in the house touching her shoulder all the way back to safety (or, on occasion, carrying her) or by laying towels across the floor.  #3 tends to be the most common option).

A car trip is also *almost* worth coming across the lava for.  (the adults in the house are sometimes almost worth it but usually, we're chopped liver.  Or more accurately we're significantly less interesting than chopped liver because Dawg is fond of chopped liver)

So when Dawg saw Mr. G headed for a car trip WITH Buffy, it was clearly worth flinging herself across the lava for...Dawg flung herself to the safety of the landing.
Unfortunately, this wasn't a Dawg-friendly trip and Dawg could not be coxed back across the kitchen (lava!  and besides, that would move her AWAY from Buffy and the car--why would anyone move away from Buffy or the car, ever?) so the Mr. set Buffy down, picked up Dawg and deposited her back onto the carpet.

Dawg was not standing for this--she braved lava and everything, how dare she be cheated out of her car trip with Buffy!  So she started edging herself out onto the lava again...she made it as far as sliding herself under the kitchen table (Mr. G was trying to get out the door before this
At that moment, Buffy cried. 


The cry startled Dawg who jumped.  The jump knocked over a chair.  The chair hit the floor with a loud BANG.  The bang made Buffy SCREAM (this would be an upgrade, er downgrade?  from cry--the pets are bothered by scream a lot more than they are bothered by cry).  The scream set la Doof Kitton (who had been stalking Dawg) into motion...his tail went puffy and his legs pulled off that scooby-doo move where the feet move frantically at a speed beyond belief...and the animal goes nowhere.
The Scooby-ing La Doof Kitton knocked over a 2nd chair.
The second chair startled Buffy out of her scream and she went quiet and alert.
And at that, La Doof Kitton got his footing and launched himself away--not quite sure where he went, but he pouted for most of the rest of the day.

Poor Dawg was utterly confused by all of this. And she was, again, carried to safety.
And didn't go on a trip.
But for some reason, I think Dawg came closer to winning than La Doof Kitton did--serves him right for stalking Melvin-the-tail-of-the-Dawg across the lava.

(and, La Doof Kitton just came over, stepped on the mouse, and closed the window I was typing this post in.  Thank goodness for autosave)